Going Round In Circles

As I sit in my own cube pondering what to do next...
How can I further streamline my life?
Where am I going?
Feeling like I'm not changing fast enough.
Not a good feeling kinda, like, all day long.
Knowing that that's not a natural thing.
Knowing that my will is that of a transformer.
An evolver.
Praying for a sign that might signal then end of my confusion.
I carried on my same fruitless routine of looking for a paycheck.
Even tho I know I am my own paycheck.
But still my reality is showing me some other shit.
Knowing that I am the change.
But feeling like I'm not changing fast enough.

A French Taste of Inspiration

The strange sculptures of artist Etienne Meneau

bet u never saw a decanter like this befo'

and a sculpture that reminds me of my current favorite film.

Can you guess which one?



What else does this remind me of???

Sacred Herb

Girl, lemme tell ya!
If you are ever having the feminine problems associated with the monthly release of toxins associated with PMS, the Sacred Herb has a remedy for you!

You might already know about this...
Seems like a no brainer.
Just so you know, I'm feeling no pain.

Self-Critique

Mood: Awake
Category: Friends

My personal philosophy alllows for many mistakes because I'll try anything once... Well, almost anything.

I thrive on personal experience. Perhaps this makes it difficult for me to take advice.

Sometimes I take it, sometimes I don't.

I'll take it if I respect the source or if the source allows itself to be questioned.

I'm very rational-- perhaps almost to a fault. Some people say I think too much!

My step mother asserted that this quality was the hallmark of my American-ness. If I was a Nigerian child, I would learn from the mistakes of others and blindly obey advice from my elders because they've been there before/seen it all/etc.

But I'm from the school of you do what you do, that's why you get what you got!

I'ma just do me! I'll take my chances.

Sometimes it works. Sometimes, not so much.

I have no shame about it. I live to fuck shit up another day! ;-)

Have you ever known anyone who could not admit to themselves that they made mistake?

For some reason, I happen to know an abundance of folks with this disease...

I personally have no problem admitting I've made a mistake. I know that I'm not above them. I make them all the time. What matters to me is the manner by which I am informed...

If I feel disrespected then, I will really show my ass.

But then I'll take some time, think about it, and then try to do better.

I've noticed however that many, if not most people are very fearful of self-critique.

Extreme cases will invent any excuse or construct an entirely new identity to avoid it.

Self-critque is the only way to grow as a person.

It's kinda like when they make you do critque session in art school.

You set out to learn something or express something. That's your artist statement.

You bring your project and your peers evaluate have you achieved your goal from their perspective.

A lot of ass kissers will just say something like "I like it." or "That's nice." But occasionally people will be generous enough to tell you the truth of what they think.

Many people could not withstand this process and I saw them run crying down the halls of Lulu Childres Hall, never to return again...

Life is kinda like that, too, sometimes.



image by carrie mae weems

*if something even remotely like this happens to you when you look in the mirror i'ma need to you self-evaluate immediately!!! it's all about self-love and self-acceptance, ya'll*

I don't do nudes.

Days later and I still can't get off the topic of nudes.

I love shooting them but I'm starting to wonder if something is wrong with me always taking my clothes off. Am I dying for attention, or trying to use it as a crutch? Is naked somehow inherently bad and I'm demon possessed trying to continually showing my goodies. Am I going to hell? Am I already there? ;-)

Anymindlessramblingway, I still shoot the nudes and i wonder what images I portray for the youth and what future opportunity to be Queen of the World I am sabotaging.

Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn.

I've always been nude and I love being nude and it's too late to stop now.
I only started wearing clothes around the house around the age of 14 at the insistence of my mother's boyfriend. My whole family is nude. No one cares. Nude is the natural state of being. The ancestral way of being. I've always known that and made the connection in my art.

I used to do the weird spaced out african body paint nudes but lately i've been exploring my sensual side.

Check out my Model Mayhem if your in the mood for an eyeful.

I think the pic above is damn hilarious.
And the clip, I have no words for. Lmafo at all the artists and models who are getting it popping or wishing. I grew out of that ages ago...

Strictly professional in the new millennium. Sheesh! There are way better methods of dating. SMH.

A Look Back...

It's important to me to know where I came from in order to remain focused on where I'm going. This is my heavy graphics phase. I still like graphics kinda... but my inspiration has undergone dramatic transformation and is still transforming.

My biggest goal at this time in my life was to make a technically complex vision that people had never seen before. Secondly, was to educate people about what I thought was my opinion about the state of the race and the fate of the planet.

Now, I realize that my real important thing to do is just communicate clearly. I'm getting out my visual shit through boomthreads.blogspot.com but I'm just trying to ship out the amount of backed up work I've shot.

Then the hard drive that had all this stuff on it crashed so who know's if I'll ever see this stuff again in its entirety and not on the internet. That's the way the cookie crumbles when u wait to do shit.

Now I no longer with to educate or compel any person's actions with information. I'm actually just more interested in completing and documenting my individual cycle of growth.

Call me selfish. That's just the shit I'm on right now.

I find it frustrating trying to make people understand what I'm saying. Some do, but that means the mind is already open. Some try to pretend they don't but that has little to do with me but relates more closely to the ignorance that they allow to colonize their mind.

Either way...

I'm on some next.

What? Me, Vote?